“Love Craft Country” and the feelings that Tick and Dee are going through with the loss of a parent

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lovecraft_Country_(TV_series)

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Title: Stop Self-Sabotage. Six steps to unlock your true motivation, harness your willpower, and get out of your own way.

Author(s): Dr. Judy Ho, PHD

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Name of Album: The Lego Movie

Artist: Tegan and Sara

Favorite Song: Everything is Awesome

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What I’m Watching

Name of Show: Big Mouth Season 4

Brief Overview: The kids are still maturing; puberty is running amuck all the while trying to navigate the new school year.

I like that Big Mouth can perfectly create a cartoon that is both educational and also comedic.

If you didn’t already know I love HBO’s Love Craft Country. And in relation to loss and how families deal with it Love Craft Country did a wonderful job of depicting it along with all the other WONDERFUL thing it did on the show. I’ll be discussing how Tick reacts to having lost his mother and getting to see her again though he knows he can never come back. And also, Tick’s reaction to seeing his mom and how he becomes that little boy again.

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How Dee feels having her mother Hippolyta back and how even though Dee gets her mother back she still feels betrayed and angered.

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Ruby and Letti’s relationship with their deceased mother.

I can see both sides of Dee and Tick’s feelings. Dee’s feels frustrated, betrayed and Tick feels safe and secure.

I appreciated the scene with Tick and mother because for anyone who’s lost someone and has healed to a point where they can safely and healthily begin to question what if I got a chance to see so and so once more? It’s nice to see it play out in such a beautiful way for Tick. He spent most of the season closing and shutting his emotions down to survive what he’s going through. The first thing he say’s to his mother once he’s in her lap is “I don’t want to die.” One of the few times he says exactly what he feels, showing is emotions, his fear. He’s feels comfortable, and safe enough to show his fear. When Tick sees his mother again he’s able to be that child again, fully embrace innocence that he as lost and has had to lose or put away to survive.

Whereas Dee is in survival mode. She’s distrusting of her mother because Hippolyta technically abandoned her. And Dee is pissed, she angry, and has every right to be. Dee’s first words to Hippolyta is, “You abandoned me.” I feel when people talk about loss, they talk about grief and the sadness, but they don’t often discuss the rage and anger you may feel about the situation of losing someone you love, and at the person you lost.

HOW I COPE: I try to cope with those emotions mostly through therapy and writing.

For Dee she’s coping with the emotions of losing her father, her best friend and for a time her mother through drawing which is what she loves to do. Tick coped positively through reading, negatively through running away to join the army and by stuffing down his emotions.

Ruby and Letti’s relationship with each other is strained. Ruby often throws shade in Letti’s face when it comes to their mother dying and how Letti didn’t show up and the resentment Ruby feels toward Letti for that. Letti tries time and time again to be a “good” sister to Ruby and all Ruby can remember is what Letti has or hasn’t done in the past.

The effects of sibling dynamics when a parent is lost to me can either make or break you. It’s not as black and white with siblings who were close will become closer, sometimes they may become more distant realizing that the parent they lost was a buffer between the two of them making the relationship balanced. Other times the siblings who were distant may become closer.

I’ll have to speak on TRAUMA BONDING in another episode.

All in all, I hope if Love Craft Country has an opportunity to have another season it will. If not, it was a joy to watch and well written.

You can find Love Craft Country on HBO MAX

I'm grateful to have siblings and friends in my support circle who have experienced loss and I can discuss my feelings and what if’s with because they have a first-hand understanding with loss.

People have a lot to say about lives they’ve never lived.

-Unknown

Meaning you can’t take everyone’s critiques and opinions seriously.

A lesson I’m still learning but walking in every day.

EXAMPLE: When I receive opinions from people, I work with I do not take them seriously b/c coworkers only know the work side of me.

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EXAMPLE: When my sibling gives me their opinion, I do take them seriously and I investigate them to prove if I can improve or that they are true because my sibling knows me and most of the time has my best interest at hand.